Actual quotes from my wife's monologue after seeing the show

“What did the sticks with pine cones mean? Nothing. What did the horn crown mean? Nothing. What did the goats mean? I dunno, probably nothing. Or maybe something, we never found out. Of all the things in the play, I think the goats got done dirty. Unlike the actors and the playwright, they never did anything wrong.” “I think this may be in the worst three plays I have ever seen.” “The actor kept directing questions to the audience such as ‘what would you do in this situation?’ In my head, I kept answering ‘not see this fucking play.’” “‘Consequences’ does not become meaningful just because you keep saying the word.” “You have to respect the actors. They knew it was bad. They definitely knew it. They still put their whole pussies into it. You have to respect that.” “And what difference did the arsenic make? Nothing. Didn’t come up. Also the cattle poisoning and all of the character backstories.” “You have a backstory, but it gives you no purpose. The purpose of you in this play is you’re in a cult. The purpose of the play is cults are scary. Or something. Some plays show, some tell, and some should come with an apology for 90 minutes you won’t get back.”

Date: 9/5/2024